Humorous Smilies

[IceWizard]

My job is worse than your job


My job is so fawking unbelievable.
I'll try to sum it up by first telling you
about the folks I work with:

First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick.
Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she
completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing
her hair or putting on make-up. She is extremely self-centered
and has never once considered the needs or
wants of anyone but herself.
She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it
surprising that she has enough brain power
to continue to breathe.

The next chick is completely the opposite.
She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet.
Her career opportunities are endless,
and yet she is here with us.
hen it comes to looks she is a zero on a
scale of 1 to 10. I'm not sure she even showers,
much less shaves her "womanly" parts. I think she might
be a lesbian, because every time we drive by
the hardware store she moans like a cat in heat.

But the jewel in the crown has got to be the fawking stoner guru.
This guy is more than just your average pothead.
In fact, he is baked before he comes to work,
during work, and I'm sure after work.
He probably hasn't been sober any time in the last ten years,
and he's only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from
the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big
fawking dog to work. Every fawking day I have to look at this
huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand
smoke. H3ll, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its
constant bellowing.
Also, both of them are constantly hungry,
requiring multiple stops to McDonald's and Burger King,
every single fawking day.

Anyway, I drive these Idiots around in my van
and we solve mysteries with ghosts and stuff.








*****


Who's the most popular guy at the nudist colony?

The one who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand
AND a dozen doughnuts