Humorous Smilies

[IceWizard]

Little Johnny's Perfect Wife

One day a teacher was talking about marriage in class.

Teacher:
"What kind of wife would you like Johnny?"

Johnny:
"I would want a wife like the moon."

Teacher:
"Wow !! what a choice...
Do you want her to be beautiful
and calm like the moon?"

Johnny:
"No, I want her to arrive at night
and then burn off in the morning!"



*******




The school class had a homework assignment to find
out about something exciting and
relate it to the class the next day.

When the time came for the little kids to give their reports,
the teacher was calling on them one at a time.

She was reluctant to call on little Johnny,
knowing that he sometimes could be a bit crude.

But, eventually, his turn came.

Little Johnny walked up to the front of the class and,
with a piece of chalk, made a small white dot
on the blackboard, then sat back down.

Well, the teacher couldn't figure out what Johnny had in mind
for his report on something exciting, so she asked him just what that was.

"It's a period,"
reported Johnny.

"Well, I can see that," she said,
"But what's so exciting about a period?"

"Heck if I know", said little Johnny,
"But, this morning, my sister said she missed one.
Dad had a heart attack, mum fainted,
and the man next door crapped his pants!"