07-08-2021, 07:31 PM
My teenage daughter thinks I’m too nosy.
At least that’s what she keeps writing in her diary.
**********
Hearing a scream from the playroom, the mother rushed in and
found her infant son pulling the hair of his four-year-old sister.
After separating them, the mother said to her daughter,
“Don’t be upset with your brother, honey.
He didn’t know he was hurting you.”
No sooner had the mother returned to her chores than
she heard more screaming.
This time she rushed in and found the baby crying.
“Now what happened?”
she asked.
“Nothing,” said the girl,
“Except that now he knows !”
**********
A family who lived deep in the woods had no electricity in their home.
The wife was about to have her first child,
so the father hurried to find a doctor.
At nightfall, the doctor asked the man to bring the lantern.
After their baby girl was delivered,
the man put the lantern back on the table.
Suddenly the doctor said,
“Hurry, bring the lantern back,”
The man complied.
Another baby girl was delivered, and
the man returned the lantern to the table.
“Quick,” said the doctor.
“Bring the light back.”
“Doc,” said the man,
“You don’t think they’re attracted to the light, do you?”
**********
A man and his wife attended a dinner party
at the home of their friends.
Near the end of the meal, the wife reprimanded her husband.
“That’s the third time you’ve gone for dessert,”
she scolded.
“The hostess must think you’re an
absolute pig.”
“I don’t think so,”
he said.
“I’ve been telling her it’s for you.”
And that's when the fight started
**********
A new bride cooked her first meal for her husband.
“My mother taught me to cook, and I can
cook two things well—apple pie and meatloaf.”
The husband took a bite of his supper and asked,
“And which one is this?”
And that's when the fight started
At least that’s what she keeps writing in her diary.
**********
Hearing a scream from the playroom, the mother rushed in and
found her infant son pulling the hair of his four-year-old sister.
After separating them, the mother said to her daughter,
“Don’t be upset with your brother, honey.
He didn’t know he was hurting you.”
No sooner had the mother returned to her chores than
she heard more screaming.
This time she rushed in and found the baby crying.
“Now what happened?”
she asked.
“Nothing,” said the girl,
“Except that now he knows !”
**********
A family who lived deep in the woods had no electricity in their home.
The wife was about to have her first child,
so the father hurried to find a doctor.
At nightfall, the doctor asked the man to bring the lantern.
After their baby girl was delivered,
the man put the lantern back on the table.
Suddenly the doctor said,
“Hurry, bring the lantern back,”
The man complied.
Another baby girl was delivered, and
the man returned the lantern to the table.
“Quick,” said the doctor.
“Bring the light back.”
“Doc,” said the man,
“You don’t think they’re attracted to the light, do you?”
**********
A man and his wife attended a dinner party
at the home of their friends.
Near the end of the meal, the wife reprimanded her husband.
“That’s the third time you’ve gone for dessert,”
she scolded.
“The hostess must think you’re an
absolute pig.”
“I don’t think so,”
he said.
“I’ve been telling her it’s for you.”
And that's when the fight started
**********
A new bride cooked her first meal for her husband.
“My mother taught me to cook, and I can
cook two things well—apple pie and meatloaf.”
The husband took a bite of his supper and asked,
“And which one is this?”
And that's when the fight started
Semper Fidelis
![[Image: SyAa0qj.png]](https://i.imgur.com/SyAa0qj.png)
USMC
USMC
Nemo me impune lacessit